Giving birth may be considered as the vehicle which enables a foetus to become a living breathing human being. This is by no means an easy task however, and a mother giving birth to a new born deserves all the support possible.
Men may never truly be able to understand what it is like to give birth. As a man, who may be assisting with bringing his own child into the world, it may be extremely stressful and frustrating based on this fact. However, it is important to realise that whatever you may be going through, you are not the one giving birth, and your prime concerns must be on the mother, for you to ensure that she is as comfortable as possible, given the situation.
Even as a female birth partner who may already have children, it is important to remember that although you may have gone through labour at some point yourself, this current scenario is not yours, and you are not experiencing what mum-to-be currently is. Furthermore, you should bear in mind that you are entirely different people, and that not only may your pain tolerance be higher than hers, the circumstances surrounding this birth/ pregnancy may be completely different.
Don’t Complain
It doesn’t help if you are a birth partner and are continually complaining about being tired, the level of service the hospital may be providing, and the fact that you may be hungry. Remember that whatever you may be going through, you are your partner’s support. She needs you to be strong, hold it together, and assist her with making the birth as stress free as possible.
Take a Pack-up
Unless you’re extremely lucky and are in and out within half an hour, you’ll probably need to take a proactive approach and plan ahead. This means food, music, hand held games, absolutely anything to help pass the time, and take mum's mind off the forthcoming contractions, as much as possible. Between eating, drinking and occupying yourselves as much as possible, remember that the labour will speed up the more active mum is. The general rule is that the longer mum stays still (i.e. lying down flat on her back), the longer the labour.
If you own one, take a gym ball along with you. This will not only be comforting for her, it will also provide her with an upright sitting position. The gentle bouncing motion (with you sitting firmly behind her) will not only assist labour to progress, it will also help occupy her mind away from the pain of the contractions. Do not panic if you haven't got access to one, as a lot of hospitals may provide one.
In essence, labour is a necessary means to an end. As a birth partner, you are also a means, to assist mum-to-be with getting through labour, and giving birth to her child. The more support you offer, the more confidence she will have delivering her child. Although internally, you may feel like a nervous wreck, externally it will seem like you in fact have it together if you take certain measures, which may include those mentioned above.
 |
